Episode Transcript
[00:00:01] Speaker A: Welcome back to Hot or Iced. This is part two of episode one. If you missed part one, you missed all the conversations about snacks and Krampus and other fun things.
Now we get to talk about Allison and the coffee club and how it all got started.
So here we go.
And we are back.
Had a lovely conversation with the neighbors about whether or not we were talking too loud.
[00:00:27] Speaker B: And then he left. So it would be better.
[00:00:29] Speaker A: So he could be better. Yeah. But not before they assured us we were not talking too loud.
[00:00:35] Speaker B: So true.
[00:00:39] Speaker A: So I forgot, as we come back for section two, to introduce the labels for our section. The first section that we just had was called Brewing. So that's our brewing section. And this is our pouring section. And this is where we invite our guests to share their stories, and we're going to ask them questions about them and their space. And today, you are our. Our guest.
Yeah. Yeah. So take off your host hat. Put on your guest hat.
And so now I'm introducing Allison Brinegar Brigar. Like vinegar, but she's nothing like vinegar.
But it's a. It's a hard G, not a soft G. That's right. That was my question. I was saying it wrong. Were you, like, when I first met you? Oh, yeah.
[00:01:34] Speaker B: I didn't.
[00:01:35] Speaker A: Yeah. Speaking of when I first met you, that was through the Indie Queer Coffee Club, which you and yours, now, our friend Summer, co founded.
[00:01:48] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:01:49] Speaker A: Yeah. And. And yeah. So just tell us a little bit about that story.
Why the coffee club, what the goal of it is, what who we are, what we do.
And it's out of the coffee club that this little endeavor was born.
[00:02:08] Speaker B: Yes.
Well, so Summer and I created Indie Queer Coffee Club. At the time we were going gaze of our lives.
But what we quickly determined is that all the young kids don't know what that is. They don't get it. Like, was that a show?
[00:02:28] Speaker A: It's a thing. Yeah. You even had a really cool photo with the hourglass.
[00:02:35] Speaker B: We did. Yes.
But our Instagram handle was always Indy Queer Coffee Club. So that describes what we are. Little bit better than gays of our lives. Although we'll always keep it as, like a tagline.
[00:02:50] Speaker A: As a tagline, yeah. Yes.
So it so flows to coffee. So past the gates of our lives.
Yeah.
[00:03:01] Speaker B: So Summer Night created the coffee club as just a activity, a safe space, if you will, for the queer community to come together. I just felt like other than pride in Indianapolis, there's. There weren't a lot of groups or activities or, you know, ways to even just meet people.
So that's kind of how it came to be.
I would have never been able to start it without Summers assistance.
So she was very integral in getting us upground. She created the Instagram Facebook page.
[00:03:49] Speaker A: Yeah. Y'all are a great team in terms of your personalities and skill sets and everything.
[00:03:56] Speaker B: Although it's interesting, we're two introverts that started a.
[00:04:01] Speaker A: Yeah. And I think that's where I came in.
[00:04:04] Speaker B: Yes. So a little bit of bad news. Summer just accepted a job in Minneapolis.
[00:04:11] Speaker A: Yeah. We're still not talking about a bunch. Right.
[00:04:13] Speaker B: We're very much in denial, but Laura Beth has graciously taken on the co.
Co. Runner role.
[00:04:23] Speaker A: Facilitator.
[00:04:24] Speaker B: Facilitator.
[00:04:25] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:04:27] Speaker B: So, yeah, we just. We needed a different coffee shop, different local coffee shop each month. We're trying right now, third Saturday.
[00:04:35] Speaker A: Ye.
[00:04:36] Speaker B: Of every month.
We've done coffee shops in Roderpool. We've done coffee shops downtown.
[00:04:45] Speaker A: East side, west side. Yeah.
[00:04:48] Speaker B: Covered them. Covered almost all. Not all, but, you know.
[00:04:51] Speaker A: Yeah. East End boys, West End girls.
[00:04:56] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:04:56] Speaker A: Sorry. Yeah. Kids probably won't get that one either.
[00:05:02] Speaker B: We do have a lot of Young.
[00:05:04] Speaker A: Younger, I mean. Yeah. Yeah. Like, young for us is people in their 20s and early 30s.
Yeah.
[00:05:11] Speaker B: But it's been great. We're open to all ages. That's the nice thing, you know, Coffee shop. We're not limited to 21 and over.
Summer likes to say that even if you drink tea, you can come.
[00:05:24] Speaker A: Yeah. It's not. It's more about the. The people than the coffee, but the coffee is kind of awesome. Yeah. Whether you're hotter iced.
[00:05:32] Speaker B: Right. We accept you.
[00:05:33] Speaker A: We accept you as you are.
As our friendship just demonstrates. Right. Yeah.
[00:05:41] Speaker B: We're on opposite sides of peanut butter jelly as well.
[00:05:44] Speaker A: Who knew? Yeah. Yeah.
[00:05:47] Speaker B: So we find we'll have to do a segment of, like, those types of things and see where we land. Like, if there's any.
[00:05:55] Speaker A: If there's any common ground.
[00:05:57] Speaker B: Yes. Or if we're just like complete opposite.
[00:05:58] Speaker A: Complete opposites.
Who knows? Yeah.
So tell me more about just the.
Like, if someone were to come and show up for Indie Queer Coffee Club. Tell me about the vibe of that room and the group and what do you. What's the agenda? What's the.
[00:06:20] Speaker B: So, yeah, I mean, we don't really have an agenda. I feel like we just was a wee. We have a little.
Little tiny vase with a pride flag that we pop on the table so people know.
[00:06:31] Speaker A: People know. That's us.
[00:06:32] Speaker B: Can find us. And then we have name tags where you can also include your pronouns. So everyone can be aware of who you are.
[00:06:43] Speaker A: Yeah.
You can self identify.
[00:06:46] Speaker B: Self identify. Yes. And then we just chat. Things just kind of come up naturally.
Just very. Like some people come right at 9 and stay the whole time. Some people come at 10, stay for an hour and leave. Some people come at 9 and don't leave till 12:30 after.
[00:07:05] Speaker A: Way after we're gone. Yeah.
[00:07:07] Speaker B: So you just come when you can.
[00:07:09] Speaker A: Yeah. There are a few of us that, especially during the semester when we were in school and studying, we would pull out computers after 11 and shift into study and workload.
[00:07:21] Speaker B: Exactly.
[00:07:21] Speaker A: Yeah. Share the space.
[00:07:26] Speaker B: We've had anywhere from like four people to our biggest group maybe has been.
[00:07:32] Speaker A: 20, 24, 25, something like that. Yeah.
[00:07:36] Speaker B: We filled a couple of rooms, for sure.
[00:07:37] Speaker A: We have. Yeah. Yeah. Kind of slowly edged other people out. It was.
Wasn't the goal, but. Right.
[00:07:46] Speaker B: Been kind of a trick too. Is now finding places that, like, have a big long table or, you know, there's a couple coffee shops that we would love to go to, but they're just kind of tiny and so.
[00:07:55] Speaker A: Yeah, it's hard to. You never know. And there's some that have great outdoor spaces.
[00:08:00] Speaker B: True.
[00:08:01] Speaker A: That we. We only go to in coconut season.
[00:08:05] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:08:08] Speaker A: The coconut. Big coconut is going to come after me.
[00:08:13] Speaker B: You just wait.
[00:08:14] Speaker A: Yeah.
Yep.
How do you feel about shredded coconut?
[00:08:22] Speaker B: That's equivalent to a bit.
[00:08:25] Speaker A: Okay, okay. We share that. Okay. So you don't like shredded coconut.
[00:08:30] Speaker B: Just the flavor.
[00:08:31] Speaker A: Yeah, just the flavor.
[00:08:32] Speaker B: People are very like polar opposites too, in terms of you either love coconut or you hate it. You know, like, people think it's like circulation and. But you can handle coconut flavor.
[00:08:43] Speaker A: I do. I can. Yeah. And I. I learned once you strip away all of the hot, peppery, spicy stuff in curry, coconut flavor is like a root flavor. And if you start there and start adding the spices back, it changes the flavor of curry, just the way I think about it. So. Yeah.
So back to the coffee club.
[00:09:06] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:09:08] Speaker A: Especially in this changing, ever changing and concerning political culture, both here in the state of Indiana as well as nationally, what do you see as the value of the coffee shop, the coffee club, and just the community and the goals that we have there?
[00:09:30] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, I think it's. It's very much a safe space to be able to talk about things that directly affect our community. I think of right after the election, a lot of us, I think, needed some time to just talk to each other.
[00:09:45] Speaker A: Yeah. That was our biggest.
[00:09:47] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
[00:09:48] Speaker A: 24, 25. Yeah.
[00:09:50] Speaker B: Who understood our fears. And there's just a lot of validation and sense of comfort and safety, I think, which has always been the goal, which is for people to be able to come and just be themselves. I think I'm one that has struggled a little bit with feeling comfortable in terms of or in regard to my sexual identity.
[00:10:15] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:10:16] Speaker B: Right. Is that right? Sexual identity?
[00:10:19] Speaker A: Sexual orientation. Sexual orientation.
[00:10:21] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:10:21] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:10:22] Speaker B: So, yeah, I think looking for that.
[00:10:27] Speaker A: Talk a little bit about that. I'm throwing her for a loop because I didn't prepare her for this part of the conversation. But, but in the context of creating community, what is your history with the queer community and what is your history with that identity? And how have you felt connected to it or disconnected from it?
I mean, if you want to, if you want to get into your coming out story, that that'd be fine. But. But yeah, more the community aspect of that.
[00:11:01] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, I think like, growing up, it was. I, I, you know, like, I think of high school, there was, you know, like a lesbian couple and maybe like people that were like rumored to be gay, but it was kind of like no one was really out, you know, at least I was from kind of a small town, you know, in the. I was in high school in the early 2000s, I guess. So I don't know, it wasn't maybe as safe for people. As safe.
[00:11:35] Speaker A: As safe as it is.
[00:11:36] Speaker B: Yeah.
And then in college, I like, really wasn't around anyone that again, was openly out. I went to Butler. It was a very like, white bubble, kind of small town feel as well, you know.
So it wasn't until I got out of college and started working with a. A woman who identified as a lesbian that I was like, oh, hold on.
And so then even, like, as I was understanding my sexual orientation, I wasn't around a lot of people in the queer community either. I was just trying to seek out spaces. And again, like, outside of pride, there's. I wasn't finding a whole lot. There was an alumni group at Butler that I like, kind of tipped my toe in. But even then, like, that was very small and it, like there weren't a whole lot of activities. And so again, that was kind of the goal for the coffee group is we need a space, you know, where you can go and hang out.
So. So honestly, I, I don't really have a lot of experience in the queer community until really, like, honestly, the last five years or so.
[00:12:58] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, I kind of knew that it was a leading question and I think that's a pretty common experience.
And I think it just Shines a spotlight on why the coffee club is a valuable thing and why we've all found value in it.
Let's talk a little bit about the diversity of people at the coffee club. So you identify as lesbian?
[00:13:27] Speaker B: I do, yeah.
[00:13:29] Speaker A: CIS woman. Okay.
Recently, we have had more feminine identifying people at the coffee club.
We have a few gay men who are some regulars. Yeah.
Who would love to see more of their own.
Their own part of the community there.
What else? I mean, we have a good mix of CIS and trans.
[00:14:08] Speaker B: I feel like more like a year ago, I feel like we had.
There was another someone else that identified as transgender that had come a couple times.
[00:14:22] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:14:24] Speaker B: I can't remember their name, but.
But yeah, so it is.
[00:14:29] Speaker A: Yeah. We had a couple that just moved recently, so. Yeah.
[00:14:33] Speaker B: Yeah, we had. And like, again, age wise, we. We had someone that was in, like, seventh grade that came for quite a while and then.
[00:14:42] Speaker A: Yeah. With a parent.
[00:14:43] Speaker B: Yeah.
And I think, unfortunately, there just weren't enough other middle school, high school people there, so they have not been in a while. But, yeah, we've had some.
Some more people our age, so, like 40s and 50s.
[00:15:02] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah.
I think I'm still the oldest.
[00:15:07] Speaker B: Might be.
I don't know.
[00:15:10] Speaker A: I'm okay with that.
Okay, I'm just gonna ask the blunt question.
Is the coffee club a place intended for matchmaking?
[00:15:30] Speaker B: No, but that can be a perk.
[00:15:32] Speaker A: Thank you. Yes.
[00:15:34] Speaker B: I mean, I think I will be completely honest. In the back of my mind, starting this group, I was like, well, maybe I'll be so. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, it's, again, not the goal, but it's. Hey, if you Actually, we had a successful.
[00:15:52] Speaker A: Shipping. Yeah, shipping. Like shipping people together.
[00:15:56] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, sure. Never heard that before.
[00:15:59] Speaker A: Oh, okay.
[00:16:01] Speaker B: Yes, we had a couple. I think they both ended up moving, so they're probably not still together, but they.
[00:16:08] Speaker A: Yeah, they were for a while.
Yeah. And we've. We've watched some couples, like, not necessarily come together through the coffee club, but start a relationship. Endurance. A relationship. And now they're both.
[00:16:21] Speaker B: And just friendships. I. I have gained so many friendships.
[00:16:26] Speaker A: Absolutely.
Exactly. Yeah.
[00:16:29] Speaker B: So.
[00:16:33] Speaker A: We do have some regulars. And it's great to know that there's people that even if you. If you're only a coffee shop, you know, you're going to see him probably once a month at least, which in adult friendships is even difficult to. Right. I mean, some of my closest friends I don't see once a month.
[00:16:51] Speaker B: Right, Exactly. Yeah.
[00:16:53] Speaker A: Yeah.
It's a good, safe community space. Good chance to meet people Good diverse community. Good coffee.
[00:17:04] Speaker B: Such good coffee.
[00:17:05] Speaker A: Yeah. And we're. We're at our time space. But I do want to ask one more question. Let's talk a little bit about the coffee places that we choose. We talked about the space, location. We do try and kind of keep within a certain radius of downtown Indy just to keep it central to most everybody.
But are all the coffee places we go to.
[00:17:34] Speaker B: Queer owned?
[00:17:35] Speaker A: Queer affirming, Queer?
[00:17:39] Speaker B: Some are, yes. Some are not. We try to make sure that they're all safe and welcoming. We did run into an issue just this past month where we were a little bit concerned that the space was a safe space. And Laura Beth graciously went to speak with them and had kind of that hard conversation of. Yeah, maybe it wasn't hard to tell.
[00:18:02] Speaker A: Me, but, like, they made it easy. Yeah, yeah. So, no, but it was a very open and blunt conversation. And there is a vulnerability on our part that I'm willing to take on. I work in churches, so I mean, I'm used to vulnerable spaces and from the expense of my queer identity, so.
And that was part of the concern about that place is it did have some. The nonprofit that owns it had some religious affiliation. So we just needed to ask the question, how are people going to be not only by the staff, but by other guests? And what is, you know, if we come in here putting our flag on the table and people are identifying around that table, what is the reception that they're going to get in the community?
And so we are guarded and protective of our people around that.
[00:18:51] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, there's another coffee shop that I would like to try at some point, but I have reservations. I really appreciate when, like here at the Avenue, right on the front door, there is a safe space queer sticker.
And a lot of the coffee shops we go to will have a flag in the window or something. Yeah, I think always makes me feel better. And this one coffee shop doesn't have anything, and it doesn't mean that they're not welcoming, but it forces.
[00:19:17] Speaker A: We just have to ask the question. Yeah.
[00:19:19] Speaker B: But, yes, we always try to make sure that it is a. A safe space, and we try to only support locals. So we've never done a Starbucks or a Duncan or, you know, you know, that's.
[00:19:29] Speaker A: There's some local ch.
[00:19:30] Speaker B: Yeah. Yes, there are some local chains, but.
[00:19:33] Speaker A: They'Re still locally owned.
[00:19:34] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:19:35] Speaker A: And good folks. And good coffee. Yes. At Tinker as well. Yes. Several different places. And their coffee is everywhere, but yes. Yeah.
So anything else about you or the Coffee shop. I have a good friend and other fellow podcaster who has taught me to say ask. The final question of any interview is, is there anything that you thought I would ask or wished I had asked before we wrap this up?
[00:20:08] Speaker B: I don't think so. I'm trying to think if there's anything we left out about the coffee group.
I will say we are in this. So we were established in August of 2022.
[00:20:22] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:20:22] Speaker B: So we're going on since this will be our third year is correct. Right. As we go into 2025. That would be our third year.
[00:20:31] Speaker A: Yeah. So at the end of August of 25 will mark three years.
[00:20:35] Speaker B: Okay. So we're trying to expand a little bit and terms of what we do. So we will always do a Saturday coffee, but we would like to maybe do an evening event, maybe partner with some queer organizations, volunteer. So try to get, you know, a few more events on the calendar each month if possible. So.
[00:20:58] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:20:58] Speaker B: And otherwise.
[00:21:00] Speaker A: Yeah, some evening stuff maybe even. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:21:03] Speaker B: Great.
[00:21:05] Speaker A: And okay, one last question.
Now, I won't do that to you.
I was gonna ask, since we have an audience and you have given this you the spotlight, did you want to like put out like a. Like a singles profile or your, your hinge match or whatever you want to get it? Do you want to?
[00:21:36] Speaker B: Well, no, I don't want to.
[00:21:40] Speaker A: Put.
[00:21:41] Speaker B: My hinge profile on here.
[00:21:42] Speaker A: Well, no, I mean, I can put your profile on. I mean, just like.
Yeah, like, what's your type?
[00:21:51] Speaker B: I mean, I think I tend to lean towards more feminine presenting, but I think it's also just about someone's personality. Yeah.
So, yeah, I, you know, I would like someone that. There's a lot on the dating providers, a lot of ethically non monogamous, which is great, but not for me. So, yes, I would want someone that would be open for that.
Yeah, I don't know. Okay, I'll give that one some more thought.
[00:22:25] Speaker A: We'll have time.
[00:22:26] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:22:26] Speaker A: We'll be back.
[00:22:27] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:22:27] Speaker A: Yeah. And it's again, it's not the focus of the podcast or the coffee club, but I just wanted to make sure that.
Yeah, I'm trying to be the good wingman here.
[00:22:40] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:22:42] Speaker A: All right, we're gonna take another break and we're gonna be back with our final section, which is Savoring.
Thanks for joining us for part two of episode one.
You know what comes next, part three. Come on back.
You can follow us at Indie Queer Coffee on Instagram or Facebook, your choice. Whatever.
See you soon.
